Following an intense emergency session, the United Nations Normalcy Council has released UN Resolution 0191 calling for an embargo of all tweets originating from the Burning Man Abnormal Behavior Containment Safe Zone. According to the resolution, twitter messages and any other form of cellular- or wireless-based communications leaking from the safe zone represent “a grave threat to worldwide normalcy by allowing the weirdness of Burning Man to escape to the outside world.” Additionally, the resolution “reflects a consensus that the international community doesn’t really want to hear up-to-the-minute updates on [a participant’s] ongoing voyage self discovery and/or how many Clifbars they have eaten today.”
The embargo strictly forbids any and all tweets, emails, cell phone transmissions, or other forms of electronic communication between the abnormal persons in the Burning Man safe zone and the outside world. The embargo also renders any Foursquare “Mayors” of Black Rock City illegitimate.
All violators of the embargo are subject to the vigorous condemnation of the international community as well as targeted “@reply Sanctions” by UNUCC.
To Report Embargo Violators to the United Nations
To report a violator of the UN Twitter Embargo, transmit the following message:
“I am reporting [@twitter_name] to @UNUCC for violating the UN Twitter Embargo of Burning Man. #BMembargo”
UNUCC Twitter Monitors will immediately be dispatched to investigate the user’s violation. Confirmed violators of the embargo will be vigorously sanctioned via Twitter and added to the listed below.
Violators of the UN Twitter Embargo of Burning Man: