Yesterday, in the most harrowing mission for the UNCCH to-date, 18 peacekeepers, inspectors, and medical staff deployed at the 2009 San Francisco Pillow Fight
The un-pillowed personnel were empowered by UN Resolution 0190, which mandated a multinational force to monitor the conflict and inspect pillows.
The United Nations was gravely alarmed by the series of ambushes that befell our neutral observers throughout the mission and strenuously condemns these appalling violations of International Pillow Law.
Militants ignored our entreaties to resist pillow conflict as well as the strong language of Resolution 0190 (2009) and the 2005 Reykjavik accords. Our observers also detected a truly shocking number of child soldiers who were specifically targeting our personnel.
The United Nations estimates that more than 2,500 militants were involved in the conflict of February 14. This represents a deeply disquieting increase in pillow militancy and extremism. Also, our observers detected a sharp increase in the severity of the violence compounded by heavy, soggy pillows due to rain conditions.
The Commission is currently in emergency session as we assess an appropriate International response to unfettered pillow militancy.